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Natural Consequences: Grief is Love
Early in my grieving after Marrett’s death, my therapist suggested that the love I held for him needed somewhere to go, now that it couldn’t be shared with his physical person. Instead, I snuggled his big wiggly hunting dog, I washed his boat, I combed through his papers and books to sift out the best…
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Trauma
It’s strange, the things your brain holds onto. I don’t often think about the day that Marrett died anymore, but when I do, it’s the same images. His dog cowering under the table watching helplessly while I do CPR. The sound of KFAN, his favorite sports radio show playing behind the instructions of the 911…
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Uninspired
What helps when you’re not sure your work actually matters? This is the question I posed to a group of colleagues a couple weeks ago when my brain, heart and spirit were sluggish with weeks of constant work, a heavy administrative load, and the unmourned (by me) death of a beloved retired pastor in my…
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Lost
A sermon on Luke 15 and feeling lost in the violence of last week I’ve always been a person who loses things. My mom would be glad to tell you stories of all the winter coats and mittens I lost as a kid. I’ve lost my wallet 4 times. I lose my keys at least…
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To Hatcher Pass
Midnight, mist rolling in across the mountain tops, it’s unclear whether the water speckling my glasses is rain or the fingerprints of passing clouds. Either way, I can barely see, as I watch the campfire slowly turning to ash amidst the drizzle. My brother’s in the orange REI tent on the other side of the…
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5th 6/28
The dread has been building inside me for weeks, since I first thought about this fifth deathiversary months ago. Tonight, on the eve of his death date, my grief was chiggers under my skin, itching, hatching, looking for a way out of its incubating chamber. I got in bed early, hoping to sleep my way…
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Let it hurt
“It’s not that big a deal. Other people have it worse” “It’s probably for the best. They were in so much pain and now that’s over.” “There are other fish in the sea. We didn’t know each other that long anyway.” These are things said to me just this week as I listened to people…
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Resurrection Requires Death
It’s been a weird week. At the same time I was attending a church member on hospice in his last days, the first daffodil bloomed at my new house. This weekend marked both the anniversary of all the Covid shut downs, as well as the anniversary of my first marriage. A year ago I was…
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Ornamental
It’s late and I’m gazing with tired eyes at my Christmas tree, laden with ornaments, decked with stories of years past. The grief mingles with happy memories as my eyes slide over the Peter Rabbit glass ball from the year of my birth, miraculously whole after 46 Christmases. I miss my aunt Sally whose noodle…
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Unromantic Partner Vision Board
Eighteen months ago, while trying to reconstruct my personal future, I wrote a vision board for my future romantic partner. If you follow this blog, you’ll have read that post already.It was a beautiful vision, and I am still compelled by it. But as I come into a new season of understanding myself and my…
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To the Rescue
Since I was a small child, I’ve had a recurring fantasy about being tucked amongst furs in a sleigh, being pulled through a wintry forest. It is equal parts the Snow Queen from the Chronicles of Narnia, and an actual memory of a family photo shoot where we children were arranged in a dogsled and…
a blog and resources about love, loss and faith.
Mother and step-mother, pastor and writer, Collette Broady Grund offers her perspective on grief and faith. Scroll down for blog posts and sermons, or click the buttons below to check out her Grief Lectionary Study or contact her about speaking engagements, workshops and small group leadership.
Collette Broady Grund 