Category: Uncategorized

  • Speaking Ill of the Saints

    As we prepare to celebrate All Saints’ Sunday this weekend, I wonder if you are feeling the complicated pull I am about the saints who surround you, both living and deceased. I am so grateful for those who have walked in faith with me, from my earliest days until now, for the ways they have […]

  • Natural Consequences: Grief is Love

    Early in my grieving after Marrett’s death, my therapist suggested that the love I held for him needed somewhere to go, now that it couldn’t be shared with his physical person. Instead, I snuggled his big wiggly hunting dog, I washed his boat, I combed through his papers and books to sift out the best […]

  • Last First Day

    Me newly 45, with her father nearing 50, we laughed about how we’d be the same age as some kindergartener’s grandparents. I teased him about how he’d surely be crying more than me (he usually did) and he told the story for the millionth time about bawling in front of his eldest daughter’s kindergarten locker, […]

  • On a Silver Platter

    Healthy. Honest. Faithful. Safe. Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries. Those are the big words from the Romantic Partner Vision Board I wrote about a couple months ago. Alongside those are many more, a detailed description of the partner I know I need for the life I have now and for the life I hope will be mine […]

  • Pushing Grief Away is Pushing God Away

    If God is love, and grief is really just love that now has no living object, then it seems obvious that God is found in grief. Yet every time I make this connection, first for myself in the wake of Marrett’s death and now regularly for others in writing, preaching and speaking, people are stunned. […]

  • God’s will and the death of our dreams

    The final post from my original Grief Lectionary writings, based on 1 Samuel 17. What happens when what we want turns out to not be what God wants? What does it feel like when our dreams of grandeur and prestige turn out to be unlike any of God’s dreams, either for us or for Themselves? […]

  • The Rage-Sads and Shattering of God

    This is one of my favorite chapters in the whole bible, and reading it now through my grief further enriches its meaning. This is a story that makes me not only love, but like God, for They seem so relatable. Like, who hasn’t wanted to destroy the people who’ve betrayed them? I know I have, […]

  • One person’s celebration is another’s grief

    One person’s celebration is another’s grief

    This is another in the series of original Grief Lectionary postings from the fall of 2020, but it resonates now as I see people both decrying and celebrating recent Supreme Court decisions. This is based on a reading from Exodus chapters 12 and 13. In this week’s reading, we hear one of the most central […]

  • Joseph and his brothers: a grief commentary

    This was originally published in the fall of 2020 by The Disrupt Worship Project. Though the Joseph story can be resonant for many life situations, today it feels like a story about what happens when the favored child of a church dares to speak God’s vision of change to those they have only known as […]

  • Romantic Partner Vision Board

    People have always told me I want too much. Mostly church people, who should know better since they follow a God who is known for wanting WAY TOO MUCH, including the love and loyalty of stiff-necked humans. It started when I was young and wanted to be a professional singer (I still want that, by […]