Cause of Death

Cause of Death: Immediate, Hypertensive Cardiovascular Disease Other Contributing Conditions: Hepatomegaly, Hepatic Steatosis Monday morning, the death certificates arrived at the funeral home, the signal I'd been waiting for to say the toxicology report was finished and the autopsy officially complete. I talked to the medical examiner Monday afternoon. He seemed as shocked as I was... Continue Reading →

The Question

I entered the church building yesterday for the first time since the funeral: to test it out, to see what it would feel like, to know whether I can actually go back to work next week as I have planned. On the one hand, it felt bad to be there, partly because everyone looked so... Continue Reading →


Devotion given this evening at the ELCA Hunger Leadership Gathering, Minneapolis Before I truly begin this devotion, I want to say a word of thanks and a dedication. First, thank you to Robin Brown for inviting me to do this devotion. Robin was an upstairs neighbor of mine at the Lutheran School of Theology in... Continue Reading →


It started with the butterflies. A dozen of them, all sizes, showed up on the front of our house the day Marrett got sick. These butterflies hatch in our neighborhood every year, but usually down the street near a neighbor's house. But Thursday last, they took up residence at Broady Grund Hollow, alighting on our... Continue Reading →


I lay in the bed I used to share with my husband, the toddler's tiny form tucked in beside me, listening as her breathing settles into sleep. My eyes are open, but I cannot see, save for the sliver of light coming from the hall. The darkness feels like a metaphor. Marrett's death is exactly... Continue Reading →

The Discipline of Joy

The sun is shining with a warmth that can only mean spring this morning, and as I came out of my favorite coffee place with my favorite chai latte in hand, I was literally stopped in my tracks by joy. It's a Monday, which is my day off each week, and I started it with... Continue Reading →

Asking for Directions

When we were in Chicago over Memorial Day, we let the girls go on their own to the Bean one evening. We wondered briefly whether it would be safe, whether they would get lost, especially since our oldest is not known for her navigational skills. They're not city kids either, and the streets would be... Continue Reading →

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